Day one of my Bobinsana dieta:
I started the Bobinsana dieta yesterday July 21st. The reason I am doing the dieta is because I have been feeling the call of the Master Plant Teacher Bobinsana. My intention is to open my heart more, love myself more and let go of past trauma that has closed my heart. I also wanted to see if it is possible to do a Bobinsana deita without being in the jungle. My life is pretty hectic. I am wanting to slow down so that I can really focus on this. Crossing my fingers that I can do this without letting the every day events get in my way. I have asked the spirit of Bobinsana to help me with this. The Bobinsana diet is similar to the ayahuasca diet plus more. For example no sweets, not even yummy fruit except bananas and apples. Nothing white so no yummy, sticky, white rice. I took my first dose of Bobinsana an hour before dinner. I went outside and sat with the medicine for awhile and had a good heart to heart talk with her. Within a few hours I was feeling pretty grounded. I wish there were words to explain it. I felt like liquid and yet solid at the same time. Clear and yet solid. Whatever the case, it felt pretty good. My wonderful curandara friend Sylvie Joy Olson Meier of Los Cielos Ayahuasca Retreat Center opened up the Bobinsana ceremony for me. She did it from her home while I was at my house. I love how that can happen. No time no space. I slept pretty good.
Bobinsana dieta day 2, 7/22:
I had lots and lots of dreams. My mom and dad who have crossed over were in my dreams. I don't really remember much of what was said except that I knew they were there and I didn't want to forget the dream. I also knew I was dreaming and was so excited to see them. I wonder if Bobinsana helps with lucid dreaming? When I woke up I didn't want to get out of bed. I kept falling back asleep. I finally got up when Sylvie texted me to see how I was doing. That is the great thing about Sylvie. She is always checking in. I was feeling a little eh when I woke up. By around 1:15 I noticed that I was feeling slightly silly and light hearted. I took a drive today because I wanted to have some alone time with the spirit of Bobinsana. I want to get to know her. Her energy if very different from the Madre (ayahuasca). I am currently not micro dosing caapi pure vine. I wanted to get to know Bobinsana all on her own. I am really liking this plant teacher. I like how she makes me feel. I think strong is a good word to use to describe her but even that isn't quite right. I found myself getting tired around 4pm. I tried to lay down for a nap but that didn't work. My eyes were tired but my body is vibrantly alive and awake. Lol Because I couldn't nap I decided to do one of Dr. Joe Dispenza's meditations “Tuning into New Potentials”. I worked on opening my heart and loving myself. It was an awesome meditation. It was a little hard to get in the zone at first because my body felt so alive but then I was able to settle in and have a great meditation. After the medi tation I felt great. Pretty normal rest of the day. I feel good.
Bobinsana dieta day 3, 7/23:
I woke up around 5:30am feeling kind of restless. I was having heart breaking memories of one of my children. Around 6:15am I decided to meditate again with Dr. Joe Dispenza's meditation. It was good. I was working on connecting to Bobinsana again and worked on healing my heart. I was able to fall asleep afterwards. I had a hard time waking up again. This is so not like me. I was in and out of sleep and having weird dreams about people being AI's. When I finally got up I was feeling kind of down and sad. Not sure why. I was feeling like I just want to get away and go sit on a beach. It is now 12:45 and I am feeling a little sad or at least not feeling happy. I might even be a little emotional. Not sure. I don't really have much of an appetite.. Bobinsana has been talking to me through my husband today. I knew it was coming from her through him. The things he said were exactly what I was asking her about. When I was in meditation these last couple of days I have asked to understand, (for no better way to explain it) my bi-polar heart. How is it that I can feel so many different emotions about a person/s and feel this wall over my heart. What are my true feelings? My husband made a comment about how we need to look at everyone that we care about as if this may be the last time we see them and what would we say if we could see past all the hurt and really say what our true feelings are. When people close to you die it is like your ego, stresses, and traumas that were covering your love bucket for them, where you hold all your true feelings and illusions, are removed so all that is left are our true feelings. There was of course a lot more said than that and then we sat and cried together (he is also taking bobinsana with me). It was really beautiful. I am so grateful for him and grateful to Doctorcita Bobinsana. I had a small family emergency and was about an hour and a half late taking my 2nd dose of bobinsana for the day. Within about an hour after taking it I felt so content. I really love this plant medicine!
Bobinsana Dieta day 4 7/24:
Today I woke up before the alarm went off to take my morning dose of Bobinsana. I quickly fell back to sleep afterwards. It was nice because this morning I woke up like I normally do. I felt happy. I immediately did my meditation. Today has been a day of observing what people say to me. I am noticing that for me Bobinsana communicates in subtle ways. I got a phone call today from one of my sons and the things he said to me felt like it was Bobinsana talking to me, then I went for a hike with a friend and her words were just what I needed to hear. I stopped at my daughter Sarah's and shared with her my day of insights. It was just what I needed. I came home and was chatting with my husband and his words were also what I needed to hear. How amazing that a plant can communicate with you through so many people. Then in the evening I had a bunch of drama come at me from about 4 or 5 different directions. My world fell apart. I felt like my world was collapsing. At about 1am I had the weirdest thing happen to me. I was laying in bed trying to fall asleep when I realized I couldn't remember one of my sons as a baby. I would try and try to have a memory and there were none. It was an actual sensation between my ears that almost hurt the more I tried to remember. I felt my solar plexus starting to get hot and the energy started to spread. I went into a full on panic attack and freaked out because I couldn't remember my baby (he is 29). Then I tried to remember my other kids as babies and I couldn't remember them as babies either. I could hardly breath. It was terrifying. I kept saying help me help me to my husband. He did everything he could to help but there really was nothing he could do. It was so insane. I have never ever experienced any thing like it. I have 7 children and today seemed to be about feeling like I have failed them. I have never really felt like or let myself feel like I have failed my kids but tonight was over the top and it was full on “you blew it”. It must have been something that I have feared or felt that needed to be released. Boy did it ever release. I talked with my wonderful curandera Sylvie today (7/25/19). She told me this is all part of the process and that it needs to come out. The reason I forgot my babies was because the Bobinsana is trying to show me who I am without my titles ie, mom, wife, owner of Mystic Planet etc. She is trying to show me my true self and my sovereignty. She worded it a lot better than that. I keep telling myself “cleanse cleanse cleanse, heal heal heal”.
Bobinsana Dieta day 5, 7/25:
This morning I woke up happy but as the day progressed I started to get angry. The anger felt like an empowered anger. I am finding that I need to really stay focused and in control. I did pretty good at staying in control. My husband was proud of me. Haha. I didn't do my meditation this morning because I was so worn out from the night before. After awhile the anger passed and I felt pretty normal for the rest of the day. I was really tired and took a nap. When I woke up I felt like myself. Doctor B. must be giving me a break after last nights surgery. Thank you Doctorcita Bobinsana. At about 11pm I turned on 70's music and danced for about an hour. I had this overwhelming feeling that this free spirited feeling that was flowing through me is who I really am. It felt amazing letting the teenager within me free.